I’m sitting here in the hospital just trying to process everything that has happened in the last couple days. It’s a little overwhelming. I’m now officially a father!
All sorts of different emotions, thoughts, and ideas are going through my head. Some good, some weird, some that would make you think, “are you out of your mind?”
The answer is obviously, yes. But give me a break– I haven’t slept more than a few hours in the last two days!
So as I process through all that has happened and how my life has changed, I came up with 9 things I can do now that I’m a father.
1. Killer sermon illustrations about fatherhood
I love me a good real-life sermon illustration! And especially love the ones where a pastor shares how his journey as a father has revealed so much about how God is a father to us. You know, the ones that kind of hit you right in the chest and cause you to have to pretend you have something in your eye. That’s what I’m talking about.
I already feel like my perspective is widening, but I can’t wait to think of one of those “knock-em-dead” kind of sermon illustrations.
2. Memorize all the verses that talk about beating your kids
I’m just kidding! Calm down all you non-spankers, and don’t send me an email about how Dr. Soandso says [this], and child psychologists recommend [such-and-such]. I’m just kidding.
I’m not going to beat my kids. I’m just going to show them I don’t hate them by introducing them to Proverbs 13:24 when needed! If you think that’s wrong– take it up with God. 
3. Tell parents-to-be how much sleep they’re going to lose
If I had $1 for every time someone told me about how I’m going to lose sleep when my baby is born, his college would already be paid for.
— Dustin W. Stout (@DustinWStout) November6, 2011
I don’t want to deny any parent-to-be the experience I had when everyone and their mother was telling me to “get your sleep in now“, and “once the baby is born, kiss your sleep goodbye.” I’m really looking forward to this. Really.
4. Watch cartoons and play with toys
In my wife’s words, “we get to be kids again“. I didn’t know what she meant right away, then I realized that most adults don’t watch cartoons and play with toys regularly like I do. Now I have an excuse!
5. Change poopy diapers
I didn’t say all these things were going to be fun. I could probably also add in getting thrown up on, drooled all over, and peed on. Ah, the glamorous part of parenthood!
6. Say “no” to events that are lame
Without having to make up an even lamer excuse. I foresee my little boy bailing us out of many a lame shin-dig. On the other hand, I’m sure he’ll be keeping us from some pretty cool shin-digs too. Ah well…
7. Go to Disnelyand way more often
Rina and I didn’t go to Disneyland enough in our first year of marriage. Having a child automatically doubles (at the very least) the amount of Disneyland trips you must take per year. This should be a given.
8. Tweet from the perspective of a baby
I got evicted today. It may have been cramped, but it was home.
— Judah Stout (@JudahStout) December4, 2011
I love to tweet. Even more so, I love tweeting as someone else who is not supposed to be tweeting, and making it funny. My son’s twitter account should be a lot of fun.
9. Look at this perfect face every single day
I know that every parent says that their baby is the cutest baby in the world, but honestly– that’s just because they’ve never seen my little man! This guy makes Hansel and Zoolander look like Shrek and Donkey. Look out ladies!
There are many more benefits that come with being a father that I have yet to uncover. As I walk through this new season of life I hope to capture what God is doing through me in hopes that it will encourage you, inspire you, warn you, and ultimately give God the glory he deserves.
So far, I can honestly say there is nothing like being given the blessing of a child. I’m truly blessed beyond my capacity to comprehend.
Are there any of these things that you can relate to? What are some things you would add to the list? You can leave a comment by clicking here.
Oh the list I could give…LOL. My favorite is the number of times you have to remind friends and loved ones that no matter how they raised their kids even if said child is YOU…that this is YOUR child and you are the one God chose to raise him or her and regardless of their wonderful intentions (see your spanking comments above) YOU’RE THE BOSS or at least the director of this show, and your rules, rule.
Praying Judah is like Kaiya and sleeps when you get home because not all babies are awake all night. At least not until they are older like Kaiya does to us now…LOL. So theirs my addition to your list…LOL.
As always David, your additions are a blessing! And thank youso much for your prayers!
Congratulations!!! Becoming a parent is THE most fulfilling role you will be given. Your list will grow and grow through life with your new one. The most helpful piece of advice given to us when we had our son 7 years ago is always be prepared to get peed on every time you change a diaper. Your little man will shoot his pistol when it meets a breeze.
It will only take a couple of times of him watering down the walls to catch on!! Enjoy life from your new view!!!
Haha! Thanks for the heads up! I’ve been fortunate enough so far that he hasn’t peed while I was changing him… I’m hoping my lucky streak holds out!
Haha lucky you! when I was baby sitting my little brother.. he always pee while I was changing him. nasty kid!
i completely admire and love how excited you are man…its really good for me to be absorbing your excitement…gets me stoked to be be a poppa one day.
One day bro! And I’ll be excited when that happens too!
I love #4, watch cartoons and play with toys. This is one I regret not doing enough with my kids when they were little. The saying is so true to enjoy your kids when theyre little because they grow up so fast and before you know it, they are having their own kids. The housework will always be there, but not your childs lifetime. I feel very fortunate to be given a second chance to be there for my grandson and watch cartoons and play toys with him…….I love you so much already Judah and I cant wait to see the world thru your eyes. Love, blessed gramma
Wow, thanks Mom! I love that phrase, “the housework will always be there, but your child’s lifetime will not.”
That is awesome…Dustin I now know where the awesomesauce comes from. We do need to remember to put our kids first. Kaiya is 11 and I feel like it was only yesterday that we were taking her to school for the first time and now we are halfway through her last year of elementary school.
how sweeettt.. though you talked about fatherhood, im excited to be a mom, but it’s still faraway… im still 20. congrats to your baby for having you!
Haha! Thanks Joyce! Any mommy-specific things you’re looking forward to?
I hear that you also get to have a lot LESS sleep!
CONGRATULATIONS GUYS!
Haha! You crack me up! Thanks brother!
First, a big, hearty congratulations to you and your wife! You are in for the ride of your life.
As for me, I’m not a father yet and not for the foreseeable future but the list made me smile.
Number 4 made me smile and laugh. I was like “What? You weren’t doing that before? Watching cartoons and playing with toys is great! You don’t need a kid for that.”
When my wife and I have kids, number 1 will apply but for my blog and not sermons. I can see lots of leadership lessons from being a father.
Thanks a lot Joe! I totally agree with the leadership lessons. I can’t wait to see your journey when that season comes!
You’re welcome.
My journey into that season may come soon. My wife is getting the itch, if you know what I mean!
Aaahh! SO CUTE! Congrats Dustn!
Thanks so much Valerie!
I’m the one who baby sits my little siblings before so goodluck on your new journey Dustn. Say hello to your sleepless nights haha!
As you know, I’m not a parent. But, your first point ressonated with me. Lately, Patricia and I have talked a lot about starting a family. Your first point came up in conversation, that we were having a few days ago. Also, point #6 keeps your from lame events. However, you’ll have to go to some lame events like horrible movies. As I stated, “not a parent!” However, I’ve worked with kids forever! I’ve sleeeepppptttt through…I MEAN WATCHED a lot of them on field trips. Anyway, congrats again to you and Rina! We miss you guys!
Hanks so much Marcus! We miss you guys too!
Congratulations Dustin! I think well be starting our family soon and this makes me even more excited about being a dad. Great list!
I’m glad to hear that Greg!
Congratz, Dustin!
Thanks Brandon!
Congrats. I saw the tweet about Judah being evicted when you tweeted it out. I was really confused for a second. Heh.
Your first point about learning a lot about God the father is dead on. A lot of people told me that, but I had no idea how true it was.
It becomes more and more real everyday doesn’t it?
Isn’t it awesome!?!
Whoa, for some reason I thought I commented on this!
When I first read this, I laughed out loud! Your 9 things were amazing and get me excited for fatherhood. My wife loved them too
Hi Dustin,
I noticed you on Twitter and decided to check out your blog. I’m new to the blogging world and started my site this past summer. Congratulations on being a father! May the Lord continue to guide you in this new exciting and fun role.
Thanks for reading Danielle! I’ll have to check out your blog as well! And thanks for the congrats! God bless you!